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"deer mutation foils hunters"
by sandy the sand man
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evolution noun :
a gradual process of change and development. Evolution is the process by which the physical characteristics of types of creatures change over time, new types of creatures develop, and others disappear.
usually evolution takes thousands of years to develop, but due to the weakening of the ozone layer and increase in pollution, the natural process is being speeded up as mutations run wild. if a mutation proves beneficial, it is passed to the offspring, and to their offspring. such a mutation has been recently documented in the north american deer population. |
for hundreds of years, deer have been hunted for food and sport. these docile, defenseless animals have until now not stood a chance against high powered weapons and skilled gamesmen. but that is all about to change. ten years ago in north dakota, a wild deer was born with strange orange markings on its fur. billy joe and billy john spotted this deer on their annual hunting trip in 1991. mistaking these vivid colors for a fellow hunter's bright orange camouflage jacket, neither of the men would shoot. the deer got away and passed this trait on to its offspring. |  |
due to booming deer populations and wide migration patterns, this deer's offspring has proliferated through the united states. it is estimated that in another twenty years, one out of three deer will carry this orange mutation. if this happens, the sport of deer hunting will suffer. hunters see the orange spots and assume it is another hunter so they will not shoot at these mutants, leaving the deer problem to multiply exponentially. the only way to solve this problem is to nip it in the bud now before it can get any worse. if all of this new breed of deer are summarily hunted down and executed before they can produce anymore offspring, then the threat will go away. there is only one sure-fire solution to this problem.
 | when you prepare for deer hunting season, make sure you bring plenty of bullets and set your scope on anything orange moving in the woods. shoot to kill anything wearing what appears to be orange camouflage. the more convincing the mutation is, the stronger and more dangerous that deer is and you can not afford to let him get away. |
make sure that you wear your brightest, orangest camouflage jacket so the mutant deer will be attracted to you and make themselves easier targets. pass this information to your hunting buddies and make sure when you go out this season that you bring along plenty of friends and spread out so you don't scare the deer. remember, if it is orange, shoot. you can't afford to miss.
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